When a Simple ‘Thank You’ Changed Everything
It was the turn of the millennium. I was an expat in Switzerland, sitting in a nondescript restaurant on a cobblestone backstreet in Vevey, unaware that a single moment would change my perspective for years to come.
My girlfriend and I – both Americans working abroad – were quietly enjoying our dinner. We rarely went out, given how expensive Switzerland could be, so this was a special treat.
At the time, Switzerland was home to many immigrants from poorer or conflict-stricken regions of Europe – particularly Eastern European countries in the Balkans and some economically depressed areas of southwestern Europe, like Portugal. It was common for people from these places to fill service-industry jobs – servers, maids, nannies.
Immigrants often went unacknowledged, overlooked by people who saw them only as “the help.” I had a close friend from Portugal who, despite being fluent in four languages and studying to become a nurse, endured constant insults and casual abuse simply because of her background.
An Unexpected Encounter
As we were about to finish our meal, our waiter approached. We assumed he’d ask if we wanted dessert or the check, but instead, in a hesitant Eastern European accent, he asked, “Are you American?”
Immediately, my guard went up. I had spent the better part of a year trying to blend into Swiss culture, acutely conscious of my American identity. My attempts to speak French were usually answered in perfect Swiss English by locals. Also, at that time – well before 9/11 or the Gulf War – being American abroad carried certain stereotypes, and the question “Are you American?” often came with baggage. Loud, khaki shorts and t-shirt wearing, baseball-capped, boorish, “own the world” baggage conveniently left ahead of me by so many before me.
But there was no dodging it. “Yes,” I replied. “We’re both from Chicago.”
Suddenly, the waiter’s eyes welled with tears as he dropped to his knees and gasped, “Thank you. I just have to say thank you.” My girlfriend and I exchanged bewildered looks. He continued, “I’m from Bosnia, and America saved my family’s life. You bombed Milosevic’s army, and we escaped. I am a refugee, and I have to work hard, but I’m alive! I have two pictures on my wall – one of Jesus Christ and one of Bill Clinton!”
At the moment, I just chuckled – thinking of Bill Clinton next to Jesus 😂. The waiter left, and the moment passed, but somehow it never really passed for me. At that moment, I learned two profound lessons.
Two Profound Lessons
- A roll of the dice can make anyone a refugee. Any one of us could become a refugee due to geography, race, gender, economics, or politics. How many brilliant people never get the chance to contribute to society because conflict, poverty, or oppression hold them back?
- America’s influence stretches farther than we often realize. Small decisions by people in positions of privilege can have huge impacts on communities half a world away.
In the decades since I lived as an expat, I’ve worked at multinational companies, meeting people from every corner of the globe. I’ve never forgotten what it felt like to be an outsider – even though I enjoyed layers of privilege as a white male in a white-collar environment where English was the default language. And I’ve never forgotten what a difference a single helping hand can make for someone forced to flee their home.
A New Refugee Crisis & My Call to Action
I’ve followed the conflict in Ukraine and Eastern Europe for the last decade, starting when Russia initially encroached on Crimea. Over the past year, I’ve become acquainted with another group of refugees – again displaced by conflict. While I might not have a vast network or a deep bank account, I do have relevant experience. So, late last year, I offered my help. This month, I’m proud to share that I was voted onto the Board of the Brain Drain Unlimited Foundation as VP of Technical Services. In the past month, we’ve worked hard to establish our core infrastructure and refine our “megaphone.” I personally spent time helping revamp our website to make our message clear and accessible.
Despite current media narratives, the numbers are indisputable – America needs immigrants. The real question is how to fix the system so we attract people with the right skill sets. Brain Drain Unlimited focuses on welcoming individuals who share American values, speak English, and want the freedom to excel. We’re bringing them here from places where political instability, war, or systemic barriers might otherwise ruin their potential. Unless you’re a Native American, at some point in your ancestry, you or your family arrived here as immigrants.
Imagine scrolling through your feed, wanting to speak your mind about a pressing issue – only to hesitate in terror because a single post might get you sentenced to 10 years in prison. In many countries, freedom of speech is a distant dream; authoritarian regimes crush any hint of dissent. That’s the stark reality for many of the talented, educated people Brain Drain Unlimited seeks to help. Their voices are silenced, and their opportunities to thrive are lost, all because of where they were born and the choices of their leaders.
Join Our Effort
I’d be grateful if you’d check out our mission at Brain Drain Unlimited and follow our journey. By lending your support, you help us offer a lifeline to genuinely remarkable, unstoppable minds (GRUMs) who are eager to contribute to America’s economy and cultural fabric.
We’re also excited to announce the world premiere of “Living After Russia” – a documentary highlighting the real stories of people who’ve left conflict, oppressive regimes, and bleak futures in search of hope.